Nb : This blog is purely for humour purposes with no references to anyone who has invited me for dinner till date and well, after reading this I am pretty sure no one will ever make the mistake again!!!
“A dinner invitation once accepted is a sacred obligation”__---___ some wise person!!!
Anything that breaks monotony is always welcome in an engineer’s life and if you talk about breaking the jinx of self made food then this call for dinner invitation was the best thing that happened to me in last few days!!! I was really sick of self made, rather under prepared food and mostly rely on junk and you know what repeating junk for 7 days a week, three times a day actually means!!!!:( I love festive season for an ‘odd invite’ that it brings along for ‘d bachelor’!!!
“please do come, awryt”, my uncle just called me to confirm that I was not disappointing them big time like I did everytime by missing almost all of the family gatherings and dinners and everything else that is reffered to as socializing according to my parents and few close friends!!
I maintained a ‘not so desperate profile’ and believe me it is the hardest thing to do when every digestive juice of yours is crying inside for something that actually tastes good, hence my tongue betrayed my ‘fake’ self and I confirmed the acceptance of dinner invitation!!!
And there I was knocking on the door after an hour or so after the call. Desperation and excitement make you do silly things, and this is what exactly I did, I preferred knocking on the door when an electric door bell was installed on the gate, to be really honest I did not notice it!!. It took them 5 minutes to notice that a creature was struggling with the gate and my uncle finally opened the door and hugged me, he pointed me to walk upto the house and checked the door bell to see if it was out of order or his ‘little boy’ was crazy!!
Fortunately he has never mentioned the line that has the power to embarrass me in every possible corner where I have little respect, the line, “beta door bell was working, why did not you use it??”
The only thing that was on my mind was good food and this sure was not on my uncle and aunty’s mind. Night actually becomes a nightmare when you are thought to be very wise and thoughtful person and I had to live it all from the moment I entered the room, and believe me living wise when you actually aren’t that wise demands a skillful way of lying and cheating!!! L(fact)!! Soon aunty ji pointed to tv and said, “This modern generation!! Ah look at them, is this music??”
Both of them looked at me for an answer that would establish that they were right in blaming the generation next for everything that they showed up on tv!!
Believe me, if not for that dinner, I would have never lied! Ah selfish me!! “This is really indecent uncle”, I replied and changed the tv channel to some news channel to kill the root cause of talks like this!!!
On dining table finally!!!!
I prided myself when I finally got on to that dinner chair, there were three chairs around the table, meant for all three sophisticated people who talk sense before dinner and make their guests wait like anything!! I believe people actually make you wait for the dinner because it serves them two things, first since you have waited for so long it is unlikely that you will waste the food. Secondly, pre dinner and post dinner conversations actually have a little history, history of love, history of times when people invited relatives and friends not just to dine with them but be with them, I mean everyone has his own square meal no?, why to invite someone to come and eat your pockets away!!! Pure love which has turned to nothing more than a formality!!!
Anyways I had waited really long to get on this chair which I valued like a chief minister values his political chair!!! I do not remember clearly but I discussed politics, religion, society and cousins along with all other things which had no relevance either with me or my hosts, like for example I tried explaining them the concept of “routing” and congestion when he asked about some layman electronic thing!!! Thus to say I actually earned my dinner after wise talks of two hours. I wish I had the recordings of all the ‘wise talking’ I did I could have easily made it to the higher levels of ministry of divinity!!!
Ah!! Finally dinner arrived, uncle and aunty made every possible effort to make my plate look like well decorated and full 200rs hotel trademark dinner plate!! I saw love and care when they were flooding my plate with everything they had prepared, I never wanted to get carried away by emotions and in order to help myself I started lying about the doctors who once had advised me to stay away from oily food and fish!! “amazing!! It always helps!!!”
I had one of the best dinner’s of my life!!!
I hope people keep me inviting!!!
message
Do not waste food.
Do not accept dinner invitations if you cant talk good!!
Keep decency at home if you really want to enjoy food!!!!

-The clock read 9:00pm.
-I turned to my side and fell asleep…..
Standing next to the doorway, I smelt the nasty smell of pure alcohol running into my lungs making me get high. I heard a voice of a woman crying for help. I couldn’t open my eyes good cause I felt my heart pounding really fast. Every time I tried to inhale, the air wasn’t put into my lungs. I couldn’t get a good look at the sign above me because it was a bit rotten. Where was I?! It looks like a basement of a factory. How did I get here?! All I remember was being in my room drawing a picture of my cat & singing “Ridin Solo” by Jason Derulo. I started to walk around to see if there was any exits close by. As I was walking slowly, my stomach started to hurt badly. I was feeling my stomach tried to talk to me. As I turned the corner to a stairway leading to a door, I heard the voice again of the woman but now it started to sound like a little girl...Where was it coming from? Is it coming from the door or I’m hearing things?! Please Lord help me!!

I started to walk really fast, I felt as if I was being watch. I did a quick 360° to see if I could spot who was staring at me…But sadly I didn’t see anybody. All of sudden I heard a sound coming from a door not so far away from me. There were three doors in front of me so I went one by one trying to open it but I got no luck because they were all lock. Urghhh!! I yelled really loud. Then I heard an echo after I said it again. The day looked like it was going really fast but I couldn’t seem to find any other exits around. Just remembering how long I was sleeping made me wonder how long I was in this place. Who I am?! Where do I live?! How do I look?! As more questions started to fill my head, I started to look around to see if I could get any reflection or something to see how I look. It was type blur when I found a broken mirror near the wall of a hallway leading to near where. When I turn around cause I felt something touch me, It was a hand of somebody Oooh how fast a jump up. What the heck is a hand doing here without its body?!!

As I was checking the hand, I started to see more body parts as I stared to the front of the endless hallway. Could this be a trap or something?! Or can it be this person was stuck here as well and was trying to get out, like me?! Ohh how freak I was getting being in this place. A chill when up my spine as I stand wondering how I was going to get out. Out of nowhere I heard a big BANG on the floor. It scared me to death so I hide behind a part of wood which was about the same height as. When I took a peek to see where it came from. I saw that the endless wall was open and three guys came out. They were speaking in this language that I understood perfectly. They were speaking French. One guy that looked the oldest was yelling at one of the guys behind him that looked the youngest and he said “Nous devons trouver la jeune fille maintenant! Avant qu'elle essaie de s'en sortir et là, le patron va couper la tête hors comme il le faisait avec le reste de l'équipe” Which means “We have to find the girl now!! Before she try to get away and then the boss will cut our heads off like he did with the rest of the guys”.

Ohh noo!! What!! They are trying to find me!! But why am I here?! I have to hide until they leave so they won’t catch me, I thought to myself. They separated looking around as I tried to walk quietly to the end of one of the shelves that was half hanging off the wall. So I kept my eyes opened, I heard a noise that came from behind me. Please not be them; please not be them, as I turned around. There stand a young girl staring at me with tears in her eyes. I made signal so she could come to me but all she did was nod her head to say no. I whispered quietly and ask what was wrong and she said “They are going to kill me next & then they are going to go after you once they finish with me”. I felt my legs go numb. This can’t be serious, right?! Why was I going to get killed for?! I aint never do harm to nobody. I guess the girl read my face because she pointed to a sign that read “All girls found between the ages of 8-18 must died because of some disease going around killing children’s”.

Tears started to form in my eyes: why is this happening?! All I did was try to behave. Now I’m caught up in some craziness and I didn’t even started to live my life yet. I started to feel heated because I was starting to get mad but the same time I was getting dizzy. I need to get water or something so I won’t pass out. I wasn’t able to stand up any more so I sat down on the floor. When I turn around to see if I can get some answer from the girl, she was gone. Where did she go?! I didn’t get her name, so I couldn’t call for her, even though the guys are around looking for me and her. Out of nowhere, I felt a hand cover me nose and in a split second I was knock out. Moments later, well I guess hours later I think. I felt like I slept long. I was awoken by voices of men. Ohh noo! I thought, they caught me, now it’s my time to die. But to my surprise when I look towards the doorway there was the girl standing and smiling at me. I wasn’t able to move to wave at her because my feet and hands were tied up tightly. Was this set up or she is going to help me escape from here?!

Sitting on the hard floor, I started to look around to see if there was something sharp on the floor to see if I can cut the rope of my feet than my hands. As I glared at the floor on the farer end, I noticed something odd on the floor. I was my book bag from school. What was it doing here?! Could they kidnap me from my home as I was leaving to school?! But this is impossible; I remember being home singing and stuff in my room. I’m getting too confused. How can I be here?! I started to cough and cough badly that it got loud. One of the guys noticed I was awake, so they came towards me. They had a folder in their hands. It said the name of chantel M. Lopez on it. Who could that be?! I said in my head as he got a sit and sat in front of me. The guy looked like between his early 20’s. His light skin complextion shown, he didn’t like to be in the sun. The room was a bit dark in some places.

As I continued to look at him so I could have idea of how he looks, so when I get out I could ID him to the police. He started to talk to me in French. He started out by saying hi, how you doing?! Sorry we got you like this but you were trying to run away from us and we didn’t want that to happen again. I sat and look at the guy face with confusion. What he was talking about again?! I ask the guy in French what he meant and he said : you are one of us, the survivors of the war that happen two months ago that wipe away all of France and Paris. Me about to laugh, I ask the guy again are you sure that was me because I don’t remember. The guy looking at me showed me pictures of me being in the war and helping them killed other guys in the colored green. “This must be a mistake”!!! I cried aloud. I am a young 16 year old girl who lives with her parents in a Madison upstate New York. The guys laughing said “Vous devez avoir rêve cette nuit kas car je n'ai pas de Madison ET je Sui’s ton père stupide “which means: You must have dream that last night because I don’t have a Madison and I am your father stupid.

Now me feeling sick to my stomach when I heard those words come out his mouth. I wanted to vomit so badly. This not true at all,” somebody is blackmailing me” I said. You just are trying to convince me so I won’t run away. He laughed and walk away to the little girl and this time in English. He said “go tell her who she is before I have to hurt you again”. The little girl came over to me and smile. Said she quietly, you are his child, your mom died when you was around 12 and I am your little sister Amanda. We are part of the reason that the world happen two months ago. Father didn’t want us to get a shot for the diseases spreading around so he took and we had to go fight in the world. The reason why you don’t remember Is because you got hit in your head with the gun and it knock you for 3 weeks. Dad wasn’t happen with it because he had me watch you instead of going doing business with him outside. I know it’s hard to believe but you have to now. We have to get ready and go out to fight before they attack us again.

With those words said, I felt my head go into shock and I started to shake badly losing my balance I went to the side. I thought to myself now I really have to die because this is not me. I am not this girl they want me to be or was before. My name is not chantel. It must be another name. I am 16 years old. I have parents and I don’t have siblings. I am the only child. I am a normal teenager that likes to get into trouble but doesn’t want violence in her life. Or could it be this is the really me?! What if I did suffer a head injury? But why can’t I seem to remember?! Why isn’t that I remember the song I was singing and the picture that I was drawing?! Why I was living somebody else’s life meanwhile my body was recovering?!

This is not impossible!! I yelled at them: “y vous les gars sont menteurs ! Je suis un teenager vous gars kidnapper et maintenant vous voulez les gars pour me transformer en votre esclave de se battre! ! “Which you guys are liars!!! I am a teenager you guys kidnap and now you guys want to turn me into your slave to fight!! After I was done, one of the guys came over and hit me with their gun in my head. With that I went into shock and pass out. Many things ran into my head: Was I supposed to die?! Why was I being kept there?! Who were those people?! I was able to think no more. I felt like it was my time to go now. What was left in life didn’t help me get to the door where I was supposed to go through. I started to hear noise again but this time. When I woke up, I saw I was in my bed with the music blasting. I see that it was making the noise I was hearing as I was knockout. I saw the picture of my cat in front of me. I noticed that when I look at my clock it said it was 3:00 am. That means, what I went through was no other then a dream that I normally had. I was back to the girl I was Marie A. Luis again. Now I know who I am.

“I don’t know about
Telling her(mom)…”
Letter written to the mother:
Dear Mom,
I miss you. Sorry I ran away. I can’t live in that house no more. There is too much happening. You pay less to me and more to the baby. I know you mad, sad, and upset, etc., with me but I did it for a reason. Halsey & I have a baby. I have been hiding him for 3 years already. I know, I know, u must be saying to yourself how? When me & Halsey was together in freshman year in college & I came out pregnant; the first time I slept with him. His parents were taking caring of him when I am visiting you and when I am in school. Even though we not together, I still spend time with Halsey & his family. I’m really sorry for not telling you. I couldn’t because I knew you would be mad at me. So thanks for caring and giving me shelter the 2 months I was here but I have to go back to my son and school. I don’t want nobody to know I have a kid only you & pa. Tell him whenever you get the chance to. Well I got to go and make the baby food. By the way, he is going to be 3 years old in 2 weeks. He looks like you. Please when you get a chance email me and tell me how you doing.
Luv ya,
Melinda Lokie

Looking towards the window of the outside world, Melinda noticed the way out to Cici’s house is by lying to her mother and tell her she is going to study for a test tomorrow. She doesn’t want to lie but she has to see Cici & Chris today before things get worse. Moments later, Ma can I go to Cici to study Mr. Brown is killing us with theses math problems. Ummm….I doesn’t know Melinda. It’s a school night and you’re not supposed to go out late at this time. Why didn’t you ask earlier?? Ma, I was doing my English report and social science homework.

Melinda, I am letting you go this time cause I trust you and plus I’m not that stupid to what goes on in your life. Go handle the situation with your friends and you better pass tomorrow test. I am giving you until 10:30pm to be outside. Thanks mom, I know you understand. You are so….. (Not letting her finish) Whatever Melinda, I’m cool when you want me to be cool. Mom, you are cool to me and I’m not lying at all. You don’t have to believe me or not. Melinda gets going now. We will talk when you get home later. Ok…sigh Melinda “bye”.

Yo I can’t believe my mom’s knew what was happening and what I was talking /thinking. She creeps me out sometimes Lucy. It’s like she knows me better than I know myself, now that’s scary. Melinda, stop being scare your mother was your age. She understands were you coming from but it does creep me out too. Do you talk loud so that she could hear you or something? Umm…. I don’t know. When the thing had happen between me and your brother, I kept quiet. She had asked me a million times “why I was quiet it wasn’t like me”. All I would say is nothing.

But it has to be something. She can’t just know out of the blue. Oooh…do you talk in your sleeps still? Or sleep walk? That could be a reason. Last time I slept over your house, you freak me out by doing that. You were talking about everything you did in the day like if you were not talking to me but you were not, you were sleeping. You would turn around and go right back to sleep like nothing happened. OmG!!! Are you serious?? Are you serious?? How come you never told me I did that? No wonder she stared at me every morning and stay asking me if everything ok. There are times where we sit in a corner and think about the interesting things that we want to happen to us without knowing if it might happen in the first place. Why make things harder than it is? Why not turn back life and make it better? If it was possible for us to do that, would you do that? I would say yes & no. I know u want to know why but I’ll only tell a couple of reasons why...Lolz. People love to pretend that they are not themselves. Got confused?! That was the point...Lolz ok well

She probably hears me speaking and stuff. This is not good. What could she be thinking at this moment? I hope she doesn’t think I have issues. I want to sit down and talk to her but I can’t she doesn’t know how I am. I don’t want her to feel bad for me. I want her to treat me like my age. I don’t want her to think I need help or something. I am a teenager and teenagers have problems they will have to deal on their own as things happen. Mom, you need to leave me alone, she yells out to the hallways.
To be continue…

It was May first week and we were expecting our salary, we had information from the accounts department that our salaries will be same as per last year’s salary. So all of us decided to meet our managing director and ask him an increase in our salaries. It was around 11:30 a.m in the morning our M.D was in good mood and so we decided that this was the right time to present before him our needs.
All twenty employees in our organization walked to his room, our Managing Director was taken aback. He said “ Why such a big crowd in my room” . One of us replied that we have a request to make, this is regarding our salary. Our M.D said “look here I am not keeping good health I have a slip disc”. Stephen replied “ Sir” our M.D said “ you people do not have any idea about the pain I am suffering”. We felt that this was not the right time our M.D had to discuss about his health to us. Actually five minute before us entering the room he was perfectly alright and had no such health problem. M.D explained to us that he was in traction and he will not be able to discuss anything about our salary right now but we were not in a position to leave the room unless he was able to atleast lend an ear to our problems. We told him that the cost for milk, vegetables have gone up, the traveling cost has gone up and we find it very difficult to meet both the ends meet. After listening to all this, he said in what way can I help you I cannot give a rise in your salary but I might consider it latter next month. Thinking that our M.D will consider revision in our salary we left his room and took our old salary for the month of April 2010.
After that day till this day he keeps limping and every afternoon he say’s he is under traction. We all keep wondering whether what he say’s true. Last week one of the supplier had come to meet him he told him the same story of he had a slip disc and he is under traction treatment. Immediately the supplier asked “How come you are in office every day” for that our M.D replied that he takes the traction treatment at home and the physiotherapist comes home every afternoon. The supplier was surprised that the traction treatment which according to most of them involves putting some weights and taking rest is done at home. The supplier was bent upon asking him further some question, he asked “ who put the traction equipment “ to that M.D replied it is my physiotherapist he comes home every afternoon. Then the supplier asked “ who will removes the traction “ for that M.D replied my wife. The supplier could not resist he gave a smile in the corner of the face, any person could easily understand that he was having a good laugh in his mind. Further the supplier was bent upon cornering our M.D he asked him “ do you have such medical faculties at home” to that our M.D replied it is hired out for 2 weeks and I am paying Rs.20,000/- for two weeks. The supplier had a good laugh in his mind and ended his conversation. He went to the other room to meet the accountant and told him all that happened during his discussions with the M.D. Finally the supplier asked the accountant is your M.D educated person. Our accountant was taken aback.

I had a weekend job as a caricature artist at the Gaylord Hotel in Nashville, TN. I had a girl with glasses sit down to be drawn. I started stroking in some lines and she decided that she didn't want be drawn with her glasses so she took them off and held them in her hand. The glasses slipped from her hand and made a 'clack' sound on the concrete floor. Even though it was kind of dark, my stand had lights and I could see her glasses out of the corner of my eye laying there at her feet. So I finished drawing her and then she reached down to get her glasses.... but they were gone. The girl, her friends and I all got down on our hand and knees looking for her glasses. I disconnected the lights from my stand looking for the 'glint' of her spectacles but we never found them. She gave up and shrugged like it was only another visit to the Vision Center for her. Even after she left, I looked for them but they were gone. And they were gone for good. Where could they have gone? Did they phase into a parallel universe like all of those socks that get lost in the laundry? Or did they lose their 'molecular cohesion' (this happens on Star Trek frequently) and dissolve into space? WOW! The mind reels!

During summer I was working as a tutor and there was a guy working with me. We would talk to eachother when there was none to tutor. He used to tell me stories of his exes, and that was all.
About the end of summer, I was seated in front of him, was talking on phone. Just when I hanged up the phone and looked at him I had a strong feeling that I knew I would meet this guy. Its not like we were meant to be together or whatever just that I would encounter this guy in my life.

I am an avid blogger and writer who has been out of an official job for a little while. After being laid off from the newspaper, I decided that I could construct compelling material similar to that of a publication on my own site. I figured why not? I was unemployed, bored, and broke. How could it get any worse?

Picking a topic that I figured not a lot of bloggers covered, I chose to go with IPhone games. Sure many individuals have IPhones, but how many of those people sit around playing games on them ALL DAY? As I mentioned before, I was quite bored. Being single, unemployed, and broke is not a good combination for fun, so in order to have material for my blog I simply played games on my IPhone constantly.

My blog was doing decent, I was averaging about $20 on Google Adsense every day, and things were definitely looking up. Many IPhone distributors and game developers asked if they could link to my site as a reference, which gained me even more traffic. Although $20 a day was enough to buy cigarettes and food, I was still worried about how I would pay for my house, child support, and so on.

As I was making my daily rounds on Craigslist looking for whatever jobs may be out there, I stumbled upon an add for an IPhone game writer/reviewer. I nearly jumped out of my chair when I saw this. They had a job title for the idea that I had come up with to combat boredom? Amazing!

Of course, I had to apply, and as one may expect I got the position. I am now making five digits and couldn't be any happier with my job. Just goes to show that a little incentive and a unique idea can take you far, no matter how silly it may seem at first.

-Jim
Mass.

20 Aug 2009

German emergency services had to use a crane to lift an overweight woman out of her home in the western city of Bottrop.

The woman, who is believed to weigh 550 lbs, was put on a stretcher, manoeuvred out of her top-floor window, and then lowered into a waiting ambulance.

Meanwhile, in Australia, a 57-year-old Brisbane man who suffered an asthma attack had to be rescued by a crane as well when emergency services failed to lift the 660 lb-man from his bed.

Authorities called a crane to help remove the obese man through a three-foot-wide window in his flat, according to a report in the Courier Mail.

"It was very important for us to be able to get a crane up there. Because of the thin stairwell it would have been virtually impossible to get him down," Steve Marmotta, station officer for Queensland Fire and Rescue Services, told the newspaper.

The man was manoeuvred out the window and then lowered 33 feet to the waiting ambulance below, 3 1/2 hours after the emergency call was made.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/germany/6063674/Obese-German-woman-lifted-from-house-by-crane.html

Wednesday May 14, 2008
by: Buck Wolf

Life indeed imitates art, especially when Star Wars geeks start drinking.

Arwel Wynne Hughes, a 27-year-old, boozed-up Briton, dressed up like Darth Vader (with a garbage bag cape!) and attacked two members of group known as the Jedi Church.

To appreciate this story, consider how seriously the British are about George Lucas' space saga. In 2001, the United Kingdom listed Jedi as a religion with some 390,000 members -- about 0.7 percent of the population.

Prosecutors say Hughes jumped over the Jedi Church wall and whacked the men with a metal crutch, pretending it was a light saber.

In his defense, Hughes' lawyer says he couldn't remember the incident, having quaffed a 2 1/2-gallon (10-liter) box of wine beforehand and doesn't remember a thing.

A judge sentenced him to two months in jail but suspended the sentence for a year. Of course, in a true Jedi court, Hughes might have been frozen in carbonite and sold off to Jabba the Hutt.

http://weirdnews.about.com/b/2008/05/14/drunken-darth-vader-punished-for-jedi-attack.htm

July 1, 2004

Who are the sexiest, rudest, funniest people in Europe?

According to a Reader’s Digest survey, the Italians are the most popular and they are the sexist as well – maybe there’s a connection.

Italy is also the country Europeans would most like to live in, and Italian the nationality they would most like to be.

The British are top of the poll on two fronts. They have the best sense of humor, say fellow Europeans, who seem to judge the Britons by Basil Fawlty, Monty Python and Mr. Bean.

And Britons are thought to have contributed most to the world, with respondents citing football, medicine and industry among others as the reason.

The survey was carried out by Reader’s Digest magazine to mark the accession of ten new states to the European Union in May 2004.

It was felt a good time to ask Europeans what they felt about each other. To find out, the Digest dispatched researchers to 19 countries across Europe, from the UK to Russia, inviting nearly 4,000 respondents to comment on any country but their own.

They asked them questions like which Europeans they liked most and least, who were the sexiest, most efficient, who had the best sense of humor and the best food, and where they’d really like to live.

The answers – some of them surprising – were published in the July issue of the Digest. Italy came out of it smelling of roses, with Europeans in love with the country, its people and its food.

Some of the main ratings:

Sexiest – Italians, followed by Spain, then France
Least sexy – Belgians
Funniest – British
Least funny - Swiss
Most efficient – Germans
Rudest – Germans, with French second
Least rude – Norway and Switzerland
Most open-minded – Dutch
Favorite European city – Paris
Favorite country – Italy, with Spain second, France third

Some respondents’ comments:

Middle-aged Belgian woman – “The Germans make too much noise and are too chauvinistic.”
Young Dutch woman – “The English do not seem to know how to behave when they’re on holiday. All they do is drink and yell.”
Spanish shop assistant on Italians – “They party and have a great sense of humor.”
Young Briton on Italians – “They know they’re sexy, which is annoying, but it makes them even more attractive.”
Briton on contribution of Irish – “They gave the world Guinness.”
Elderly Swiss man on British contribution to world – “They created football.”

http://www.thatsweird.net/news25.shtml

These are some of the strange, weird and wacky stories of 2005:

A taxi driver in Dallas, Texas, was prosecuted for sprinkling dried faeces on pastries in a grocery shop. Customers had complained that the fresh-baked items smelled and tasted like manure.

A 29-year-old woman in the UK admitted that she had not washed her hair in 11 years.

A traffic warden slapped a parking ticket on a car which had its dead driver slumped at the wheel outside a shopping mall in Sydney, Australia. The warden failed to notice the man inside and issued the parking fine two days before the body was discovered.

Odd fish with human faces caused a sensation in South Korea. They were actually mutants born of carp and leather carp - but they looked really scary and spooky.

A straying couple in Jordan both started sizzling affairs in cyberspace. But the bad news for both is they found out they were married to each other.

A British bank had to apologise to a customer after they sent him a debit card bearing the name "Mr Dick Head". Very embarrassingly for the card owner, he did not spot the mistake until he tried to buy something at a supermarket.

A parcel that vibrated and made strange noises sparked off a bomb alert in a German post office. Workers contacted the owner, who was forced to explain the contents - they turned out to be an inflatable sex doll.

A cat chewed the toes off the right foot of an elderly woman with senile dementia while she was asleep at a home for the aged in Japan. Workers found the 88-year-old woman bleeding from her feet, with all the toes missing from her right foot. Paw prints of a cat were found on the floor of the room.

A giant 13-foot (3.9m) python exploded after attacking and attempting to eat an alligator. Rangers in the Everglades National Park, Florida, found the snake lying dead with the 6-foot (1.6m) alligator protruding from its middle.

Dog lovers mourned the death of Sam, the world's ugliest dog. Sam became a celebrity after winning an ugly pet contest in the US twice. When Sam died, its owner said: "I don't think there'll ever be another Sam. Some people might think that's a good thing."

A sparrow nearly ruined a world record attempt at dominoes when it flew in through an exhibition centre window and knocked down 23,000 tiles. Organisers shot the little bird, causing an outcry. As a tribute, the bird's body will be displayed in a museum.

A court in Ontario acquitted a man of sexual assault charges because he suffered from "Sexsomnia" and was, as he claimed, asleep at the time of the incident.

http://www.thatsweird.net/news33.shtml

It was like a scene out of a video game when the new Xbox 360 console went on sale at a Wal-Mart Supercenter in northeast Maryland.

Mayhem erupted in Elkton as a crowd of shoppers rushed to their get their hands on the much sought-after new video game console.

Customers were knocked down and tramped in the melee and it took 10 police officers to restore order.

Hundreds of customers had been queuing up for as long as 12 hours for the Xbox, due to go on sale at one minute past midnight on November 22nd, 2005. All were eager to be among the first to buy this must-have leisure item for the holiday season.

But instead of using a number system, the store manager announced that the Xboxes would be sold on a first-come, first-served basis, so triggering the mayhem.

All hell broke loose, according to one man who had been waiting in line since 4 p.m.

While a number of customers were knocked down and trampled, police reported that there were no serious injuries.

The sale was canceled by Wal-Mart and everyone was ordered by leave by the police.

About ten million female births in India may have been lost to abortion and sex selection over the past 20 years because of a traditional preference for boys.

These are the shock findings of a report, published in the British Medical Journal, Lancet.

The study lays the blame squarely on the use of ultrasound screening which can tell families whether their child will be a boy or a girl.

The research, based on a national survey of more than one million households, found an unusual gender imbalance in the country.

The gender imbalance in India has been known about for some time. It has caused a marriage crisis in rural areas where thousands of young men are failing to find brides.

The latest research was carried out by Prabhat Jha of St Michael's Hospital at the University of Toronto, Canada, and Rajesh Kumar of the Postgraduate Institute of Medical Research in Chandigarh, India.

In their study published in the Lancet journal (Jan 2006), they said prenatal selection and selective abortion was causing the loss of 500,000 girls a year.

Their research was based on a national survey of 1.1m households in 1998.

The researchers claimed the "girl deficit" was more common among educated women but did not vary according to religion.

They found that there was an increasing tendency to select boys when previous children had been girls.

Prabhat Jha said conservative estimates in the research suggested half a million girls were being lost each year.

"If this practice has been common for most of the past two decades since access to ultrasound became widespread, then a figure of 10m missing female births would not be unreasonable."

In most countries, women slightly outnumber men. But separate research for the year 2001 showed that for every 1,000 male babies born in India, there were only 933 girls.

Traditionally female children have been regarded as inferior and a liability in India. This is said to be a throw back to the time when India was primarily an agrarian society where boys were considered more useful for farm work.

http://www.thatsweird.net/news34.shtml

Oct 15, 2007

He dresses in expensive designer clothes by Armani and Luis Vuitton and stays at the poshest hotels.

But Kevin Castle who hides behind the face of a respectable businessman is a 'millionaire shoplifter' who makes £1,000 (over $2000) a day from his crimes.

British police, who are hunting the well-dressed crook with a taste for the good life, have declared him 'most wanted'.

Castle is being sought by three police forces - Lancashire, Greater Manchester and Nottinghamshire - for shoplifting, identity theft, interception of mail and money laundering.

Police say Britain's top shoplifter (pictured above) always wears expensive designer clothes such as Armani, Luis Vuitton and Versace.

The 42-year-old is known to frequent high-class establishments in London such as the Ritz, Claridges and the Dorchester Hotel.

Castle often uses hire cars and tends to favor large vehicles such as the Porsche Cayenne, VW Touareg SUV and Jaguars.

He is believed to be currently living in London in rented accommodation (possibly costing at least £1,000 (over $2000) per week, say police.

Detective Constable Anita Fishwick, of Lancashire police, said: "This man likes to think he is a criminal mastermind.

"There is no doubt he is Britain's biggest shoplifter. He lives and looks like a millionaire.

"He is a suave, charismatic businessman who has made shoplifting his trade.

"Mr Castle is quite distinctive because of his clothing and his millionaire-type lifestyle.

"We are very keen to trace this man and speak to him in connection with our inquiries."

Castle often targets DIY stores and returns the stolen items with forged till receipts.

He is featured on Lancashire Constabulary's Most Wanted website: http://www.lancashire.police.uk.

http://www.thatsweird.net/news43.shtml

July 23, 2007

Church leaders are using the magic of Harry Potter to help spread the Christian message.

In the past Harry Potter books and movies have been attacked by evangelicals for 'glamorising the occult.'

But now a guide published by the Church of England advises youth workers how to use the wizardry of fantasy novelist J. K. Rowling as a launch pad for exploring Bible themes.

The publication of the guide by Church House Publishing comes with the release of the final Potter book 'Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows'.

Youth leaders are being told they can use the popularity of the Potter series to spread the word of God.

This is a shift in emphasis for the Church, which up to now had not always been sympathetic to the Potter magic.

Canterbury Cathedral shot down a request to become a location for the first film, Harry Potter And The Philosopher's Stone, for fear of upsetting Christians.

But in recent years, the Harry Potter phenomenon has won fans from among leading Church figures, including former archbishop of Canterbury Dr George Carey.

He described the film as "great fun" and a serious examination of good and evil.

Another Potter convert is the Bishop of Oxford, the Rt Rev John Pritchard, who described Harry Potter author JK Rowling as a "great storyteller".

He reminded people that Jesus used storytelling to engage and challenge his listeners.

Author of the guide, 24-year-old youth worker Owen Smith, said: "The magic in the books is simply part of the magic that JK Rowling has created.

"To say, as some have, that these books draw younger readers towards the occult seems to me both to malign JK Rowling and to vastly underestimate the ability of children and young people to separate the real from the imaginary."

http://www.thatsweird.net/news40.shtml

A 29-year-old Tennessee man has fathered 21 children with 11 different women.

Children's shoes /Rex

Desmond Hatchett's extended offspring came to light after authorities took him to court for non-payment of child support.

He has apparently set a US record but said: "It just happened."

Residents of his home town of Knoxville are angry with some even calling for him to be castrated.

But Mr Hatchett said he would not have any more children: "I'm done. I'll say I'm done," he said.

Mr Hatchett, who earns a minimal wage, told TV reporters he knows the names and ages of all his offspring who range from newborn to 11 years old.

Authorities in Knoxville said they plan to take half of his monthly salary to pay for the youngsters but officials said that would work out at just over £1 a week for each child.

His lawyer Keith Pope said: "The children can't all be supported by Desmond, so the state of Tennessee has had to step in."

One mother, who has two children with him, said she should get £44 a month but rarely receives any child support.

"It's frustrating, but usually, when I ask he gives it to me," she said.

(http://www.ananova.com)

Two Star Wars fans are in a critical condition in hospital after apparently trying to make light sabres by filling fluorescent light tubes with petrol.

A man, aged 20, and a girl of 17 are believed to have been filming a mock duel when they poured fuel into two glass tubes and lit it.

The pair were rushed to hospital after one of the devices exploded in woodland at Hemel Hempstead, Hertfordshire.

A third person present at the incident had been questioned, police said.

Videotape found

A videotape was found nearby by police called to the scene on Sunday.

A police spokeswoman said the pair were taken to West Herts Hospital before being transferred to the specialist burns unit at Broomfield Hospital, Chelmsford, in Essex.

They are both said to be in a critical condition.

She said the 17-year-old girl and a 20-year-old man from Hemel Hempstead suffered serious injuries.

She added: "At this stage we are unable to confirm the exact circumstances, but glass tubes and traces of accelerant (flammable substance) were found at the scene."

The final film in the Star Wars series, Revenge Of The Sith, arrived at UK cinemas last week.

One of the crucial scenes features a light sabre battle between Ewan McGregor's Obi-Wan Kenobi and Hayden Christensen as Anakin Skywalker.

(http://news.bbc.co.uk)

A man sat at a metro station in Washington DC and started to play the violin; it was a cold January morning. He played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time, since it was rush hour, it was calculated that thousand of people went through the station, most of them on their way to work.
Three minutes went by and a middle aged man noticed there was musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried up to meet his schedule. A minute later, the violinist received his first dollar tip from a woman who threw the money in the till and without stopping continued to walk. A few minutes later, someone leaned against the wall to listen to him, but the man looked at his watch and started to walk again. Clearly he was late for work.
The one who paid the most attention was a 3 year old boy.His mother tagged him along, hurried but the kid stopped to look at the violinist. Finally the mother pushed hard and the child ontinued to walk turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. All the parents, without exception, forced them to move on.

In the 45 minutes the musician played, only 6 people stopped and stayed for a while. About 20 gave him money but continued to walk their normal pace. He collected $32. When he finished
playing and silence took over, no one noticed it. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition.

No one knew this but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the best musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth 3.5 million dollars.

Two days before his playing in the subway, tickets for Joshua Bell's performance at a theater in Boston were sold out and the seats averaged $100.

This is a real story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and priorities of people. The outlines were as follows:
In a commonplace environment at an inappropriate hour, Do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize the talent in an unexpected context?

One of the possible conclusions from this experience could be: If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world playing the best music ever written, how many other things are we missing?

Last summer I learned how to ride a motorcycle and had an accident on my second day out. Being the stubborn Capricorn I am, I decided to give it another go and set out for another night of cruising. About a mile away from my home, I felt a slipping sensation from the back tire of the motorcycle and decided to check the tire pressures. The tires were filled adequately to OEM specifications but I still had a bad feeling. To the ridicule of my riding buddies, I decided not to make the journey that night and instead retired home for the evening. Within a half an hour I was back online surfing the internet with no thoughts of what had happened earlier when I went to check my email from the Bookmark section of my FireFox browser, I was redirected to an Amazon.com page selling "The Mouse and The Motorcycle", a book by Beverly Cleary -- a page I have never visited before.

I took it as a sign and was happy with my decision to head back home and forgo a night of riding.