“I don’t know about
Telling her(mom)…”
Letter written to the mother:
Dear Mom,
I miss you. Sorry I ran away. I can’t live in that house no more. There is too much happening. You pay less to me and more to the baby. I know you mad, sad, and upset, etc., with me but I did it for a reason. Halsey & I have a baby. I have been hiding him for 3 years already. I know, I know, u must be saying to yourself how? When me & Halsey was together in freshman year in college & I came out pregnant; the first time I slept with him. His parents were taking caring of him when I am visiting you and when I am in school. Even though we not together, I still spend time with Halsey & his family. I’m really sorry for not telling you. I couldn’t because I knew you would be mad at me. So thanks for caring and giving me shelter the 2 months I was here but I have to go back to my son and school. I don’t want nobody to know I have a kid only you & pa. Tell him whenever you get the chance to. Well I got to go and make the baby food. By the way, he is going to be 3 years old in 2 weeks. He looks like you. Please when you get a chance email me and tell me how you doing.
Luv ya,
Melinda Lokie

Looking towards the window of the outside world, Melinda noticed the way out to Cici’s house is by lying to her mother and tell her she is going to study for a test tomorrow. She doesn’t want to lie but she has to see Cici & Chris today before things get worse. Moments later, Ma can I go to Cici to study Mr. Brown is killing us with theses math problems. Ummm….I doesn’t know Melinda. It’s a school night and you’re not supposed to go out late at this time. Why didn’t you ask earlier?? Ma, I was doing my English report and social science homework.

Melinda, I am letting you go this time cause I trust you and plus I’m not that stupid to what goes on in your life. Go handle the situation with your friends and you better pass tomorrow test. I am giving you until 10:30pm to be outside. Thanks mom, I know you understand. You are so….. (Not letting her finish) Whatever Melinda, I’m cool when you want me to be cool. Mom, you are cool to me and I’m not lying at all. You don’t have to believe me or not. Melinda gets going now. We will talk when you get home later. Ok…sigh Melinda “bye”.

Yo I can’t believe my mom’s knew what was happening and what I was talking /thinking. She creeps me out sometimes Lucy. It’s like she knows me better than I know myself, now that’s scary. Melinda, stop being scare your mother was your age. She understands were you coming from but it does creep me out too. Do you talk loud so that she could hear you or something? Umm…. I don’t know. When the thing had happen between me and your brother, I kept quiet. She had asked me a million times “why I was quiet it wasn’t like me”. All I would say is nothing.

But it has to be something. She can’t just know out of the blue. Oooh…do you talk in your sleeps still? Or sleep walk? That could be a reason. Last time I slept over your house, you freak me out by doing that. You were talking about everything you did in the day like if you were not talking to me but you were not, you were sleeping. You would turn around and go right back to sleep like nothing happened. OmG!!! Are you serious?? Are you serious?? How come you never told me I did that? No wonder she stared at me every morning and stay asking me if everything ok. There are times where we sit in a corner and think about the interesting things that we want to happen to us without knowing if it might happen in the first place. Why make things harder than it is? Why not turn back life and make it better? If it was possible for us to do that, would you do that? I would say yes & no. I know u want to know why but I’ll only tell a couple of reasons why...Lolz. People love to pretend that they are not themselves. Got confused?! That was the point...Lolz ok well

She probably hears me speaking and stuff. This is not good. What could she be thinking at this moment? I hope she doesn’t think I have issues. I want to sit down and talk to her but I can’t she doesn’t know how I am. I don’t want her to feel bad for me. I want her to treat me like my age. I don’t want her to think I need help or something. I am a teenager and teenagers have problems they will have to deal on their own as things happen. Mom, you need to leave me alone, she yells out to the hallways.
To be continue…